Archive for the Category »What's It All About «

07
Dec
What Can Be Said In 140 Or Less
Denyse

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.  The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.  ~Henri Nouwen

This is a small thank you to those of you that have touched me through my Twitter stream.  Today I reached 50,000 followers.  It is with a very humble heart that I share this with you.  13 months ago when I started writing my profile and signing up on Twitter I thought, who is going to follow me and what will I ever say to them?  What I have found in Twitter can only be understood if you connect to others on Twitter yourself.

Who would think that someone you do not even know, that might even live a world apart from you, would ever have really touch you in any way that really mattered.  The followers in my stream on Twitter do that each and every day.  There is never a day that goes by that someone does not ask me how I am doing, and really is waiting for a genuine answer.  They are not saying that just because they need something to tweet.  They are saying it because we have connected!

Within 140 characters we connect in such a way that I never would have thought possible.  We have shared the joys and pains of our lives.  We have cheered at achievements and listened when an ear is all that we can give.  We have reached across the miles, across borders, stretching into countries we will never see, and we have connected in such a way that lives have actually been changed just by tweeting.

I saw the love and caring working at it’s fullest in Twitter when I lost my mother this past summer.  People from my stream that I had never connected with followed her health progress with me.  They prayed and told others and people that were not even following me were praying.  It is not only your followers that touch you, but they ReTweet to people following them, and some of those people in turn also reach out to you to offer you hope and comfort.

When Mom passed on, many of my followers listened to me and offered me love and comfort and encouragement.  Some even shared loss of their own parents with me.  It was a process of healing and these people helped so much.  As in the quote above these people chose to share my pain with me and reached out and touched me with the viral hand of 140 characters.  Often they only gave me a place to share my grief, but they were always there.

Besides, the sorrow they also share in the joy!  Many connect and ask how business is going, how the projects are going, and are interested in what is going on in our lives.  Yes, we even laugh and joke and play tricks on each other, make fun of our funny hats, or dance in the rain, or a number of crazy other things like the week we had a virtual pillow fight!

My Twitter stream is filled with new friends.  A year ago these people were strangers to me.  Today, right now, I could send out a tweet and someone would be there to answer a question or smile with me, or share a moment of my day.  Twitter changes daily, so people will come and go, but the spirit of the people of my Twitter stream will be always with me.  Many people have touched my life just by connecting.

When you follow someone, you actually do yourself a great disservice to not try to connect.  You just never know what kind spirit you may find that will touch your lives as so many have touched mine.

To my followers, I thank you for the wonderful opportunity you have given me to connect with you, to learn from you, to laugh with you and to share moments of our lives.

Follow me on twitter if you don’t already

http://www.twitter.com/denyseduhaime


Category: About Life, Just Thinking, My Twitter Family, Reflecting, To Tweet Or Not To Tweet, What's It All About  Tags: , , , ,  Leave a Comment
11
Nov
My Unforgotten Hero
Denyse

We all have heroes in our lives.  Some of them are just a  silent hero, but they are never forgotten.  My Dad is my unforgotten Hero.  He was a wonderful role model throughout his life.

Dad fathers like you are rare.  You are gone now, it’s just been over a year, but your memory lives on.  So do memories of all of the things that you did.  You are one of God’s precious treasures.  You were given on loan to your family, your friends, and your country.  Most families do not have such a wonderful role model to look up to and to respect.

Dad home on leave during the War

Dad home on leave during the War

This being Veterans day is a perfect time to thank you Dad for all you did.  You fought for our freedom in WWII so that your children could have a better life than you had.  You had great dreams for your children and we have all tried our best to make you proud.

You taught us to love unconditionally as you did that to us.  You taught us many lessons, some we did not even know that you were teaching us values we would use throughout our lives.

You had dreams of getting married, and having a family when the war called and you answered the call, not because you had to , but because you thought it was the right thing to do.  You married mom just before you left to fight in those war fields aboard.  You were brave beyond anything we can ever understand or ever know.  God returned you to your wife and you had your family.  I am grateful for all that you have stood for and all that you have done.

I was proud when the Army came and gave you a military send off.  I have always been proud of you!

To all Veterans that have fought for our freedom and to all that are still fighting every day so that we may live in our country and do what we love to do, I thank you all.

Category: Family, What's It All About, Who Is Denyse  Tags: , , , ,  2 Comments
09
Nov
Reflecting–Do We Do It?
Denyse

Reading without reflecting is like eating without digesting. ~Edmund Burke

I sent out this quoted tweet tonight and it got me thinking.  Actually a lot of my tweets today were on the subject of thoughts.  How many times we we read a quote and not really digest what was being said.  We quickly Re Tweet it for our friends to share, and we move on to read the next tweet.  Often these quotes are worth more than the brief second of time that we give them.

There are so many powerful words that are passed between us with tweets.  Some of them are by our World’s most famous authors, but often some are just the thoughts of one of our followers.  I have found some very thought provoking ideas being share.  However, if we do not take time to reflect on the words we are reading, then we are just reading words.

I know I am guilty of this in reading other things like emails or even some blog postings.  I am a pretty fast reader and sometimes I find myself skimming the content looking for the juice of the subject.  I especially do this in reading articles and web content.

There are a lot of tweets that go by our streams and we cannot possibly read every single one of them.  So we pick and chose followers that we enjoy reading.  A lot of the tweeting that we do among ourselves is all in fun, and we are relating to each other, trying to break the ice or cultivate a friendship.  We thank people politely for Re Tweet us, and we ask how our friends are and what they are up to.

However, there are tweets that our followers send that are certainly worth those extra few mins while we try to absorb the idea.  We might not always agree with the idea, and that is a perfect time to start a real conversation.  There is nothing wrong at all in having a difference of opinion, in fact sparring is great for the spirit and for the mind.

I am hoping that in the posting that I start to write in this blog will cause you to do some contemplation of my thoughts and you will feel free to add comments of your own.  My thoughts come from my life’s experiences and they are very different from yours.  I know the next time that I read a blog posting, or an email from a friend, I am going to take a second read and think about that person and what their thoughts are and how they affect me.  I have a feeling that I will learn a lot about myself when I do this.

Category: Reflecting, What's It All About  Tags: , ,  4 Comments
05
Nov
Fool Yourself?
Denyse

The first principle is that you must not fool yourself, and you’re the easiest person to fool.  ~Richard Feynman

How many times have I said, well just this little treat is not going to make a difference?  How many times have I taken that piece of candy because it was offered to me?  How many times have I added calories to something that I did not need to, like adding butter to a helping of string beans?  Did I really think that I was fooling myself?

I never really thought of it in terms of fooling myself, but indeed I was trying to.  Of course all of those things are going to add calories.  None of them are even important in the big scheme of things.  I really have to stay focused on what is important to me in the long range goal.  It might be OK to give yourself a reward as you accomplish small goals, but the reward does not have to be food.

I went to some diet club meetings last year and after the weigh in on Tuesday night a select group would all go out to eat.  One week I went with a few of these people.  Because the scale showed a loss, there was a sense within the group that they all deserved a treat.  Not only a great meal, but also deserts. I went along with the group after all I had lost weight that week and I too deserved to treat myself for the awesome job I did.  Today, I realize that I was only fooling myself.  What a crazy thought that was that I deserved to eat more, when all week I had tried so hard to eat less.  This time my rewards to myself will be a different type of thing.

I do think that I deserve to reward myself, but not because I lost weight, but because I have looked at something that I do not like in my life and I am making an attempt to change it.  That in itself, will be a reward.  The ultimate reward will be when I feel better, have lost weight and can do different things than I can do right now.

So as easy as I am to buy into these little foolish things I believed, that too will be part of the while lifestyle change.  I need to stop fooling myself too into thinking I am doing the best I can.  I know I can do more, and in the days to come I will prove it to myself.

For today it has been only a couple of days, but I have lost 1 pound.  It is not much, it is a baby step, but it is having the scale going in the other direction for the first time in months.

I will not try to fool myself!  Affirmation for today!

Category: Weight Loss My Story, What's It All About  Tags: , , ,  Leave a Comment
02
Nov
Looking at the Truth
Denyse

Today is the day of truth.  I actually thought this morning, well I can put this off one more day, what will one more day matter.  One day does matter, they all matter.  So I pulled out my dusty scale.  Here it is, the one thing that knows the truth.  It knows where I was as I had set the beginning weight, and once I step on it, it will show me how far I have fallen off that path. Do I really want to know?  Will knowing this help me, or will it make me discouraged even more.

There comes a time in everyone’s life when they have to look at one or more truths.  Today it might seem like a little thing, but it actually stands for a lot more than stepping on the scale.  It takes courage to look at the truth, no matter how big or how small.  Today this is just a small thing.  Minor in the life scheme of things.  However the whole picture is that it takes courage to face reality and truth and to be able to make a change.

It does not matter if it is some thing like changing the amount of food that you eat, or looking at a friendship that is very toxic, or seeing your job in the light of day, all of these things take courage.  Courage is looking at what is there, maybe being afraid, but going onward and trying to make a change and do it anyway.  Things don’t always work out the way that you think they will, but it takes courage to even find that out.  It takes courage to let go of the familiar, to forge forward to the unknown, to try something new, to make a stand or to make a change.

When we make a change, what is it we fear.  If we stay the same, then what?  In this instance, if I do not make a change in my lifestyle, then things might change in a negative way over which I will have not control.  So I really have nothing to lose, but everything to gain.  Is that not true in all of life?  If we have courage to look at our truths, we have a lot of good that we can gain from that awareness.

Samuel Johnson has said that “Courage is recokoned the greatest of all virtues: because, unless a man has that virtue, he has no security for preserving any other.”  So we all need courage in our every day life to face the big truths and the small truths and then once we face them, to make the changes in our lives that you deserve.  You are important, and you are the captain of your own life.

So yes, today, I will look at this little truth, but I will know that by looking at it, I no longer can put it off, that I must do something starting now to make a change.

So I take the dusty scale, brush it off, and try to think of it as a friend and not the enemy.  I step onto it to look at the truth.  Ok, it is bad, but it is not as terrible as I had thought.  Yes, I have gained a large % of the weight I lost back again, but now I know the truth, and I know where I can start.

Today courage was looking at the fear, fear of what I really already knew, but facing it anyway realizing that something else was much bigger than fear.  My well being, me, I am more important!

Category: Weight Loss My Story, What's It All About  Tags: , , , , ,  2 Comments
01
Nov
DIET The Four Letter Word
Denyse

When did the battle really begin and will it ever really end?  I was a very active child and young adult.  I played softball, volleyball, and basketball.  I shot archery courses that winded through wooden trails and hills.  I canoed, hiked, skied, skated and camped.  I was thin.  I was active and I loved participating in activities of all kinds.  I would try most things from horseback riding (even after I got thrown off) to water skiing ( which I was horrible at) to a several day canoe trip.  It was all great and it was always fun.

Things changed when other responsibilities came along and the activities went to the sidelines and I became more of a spectator than being active in them.  I know that lack of that constant exercise made a significant difference in my life.  Compounded with a serious medical situation, the weight started to come on.  I really did not notice it at first, well maybe in honesty I did, but I did not think much about it.  I had always been thin and I knew that I was not going to be fat.

I am not sure when the real realization came, maybe that day when I had to look in the woman department for things that fit.  I started to do things like weight watchers, but found myself yo-yoing.  This was not working.  I tried another diet program and I lost 50 pounds, but the program was pulled because it was found to be unsafe.  As soon as I stopped the program the weight came back on.

The Scales never Lie to You

The Scales Never Lie to You

I tried a few more programs, one using their food, I gained weight.  Another I lost for a while, but plateaued quickly. What I did not realize was that I was not helping myself at all.  What I was doing was really very unhealthy for me.

About three years ago I really started looking at what was happening.  You can read my story at Weight Loss My Story.

I suceeded in taking off just over 70 pounds, I thought that I was on my way to losing a hundred pounds.  I had changed things a lot.  I had stopped looking at weight loss as diet, and had started to think about it as a entire lifestyle change.  I went to lifestyle management, I exercised, used a tread mill, then I joined a gym.  I walked farther than I had been able to.  Things were really changing, I was feeling tons better about myself.

Things slowly feel apart.  I let myself down.  I have no one to blame but myself, as we are all responsible for our own actions.  It is much easier to take that piece of candy, than it is to say no thank you.  It is easier to stop going to the gym, then to make time for yourself to do it.  If I tried, I could come up with a thousand excuses, but honestly there really is none for not feeling that you as a person, are worth taking care of yourself.  I always have taken care of everyone else first.  It is what I am good at.

Yes, the pounds slowly came back on again.  It has been a struggle and at first I thought when things settle down with my dad’s health, and then again with my mom’s health, I will begin again.  But then both of my parents passed on, and the weight gain continued.

I had left behind the new lifestyle that I had worked so hard to establish.  So now, it is time.  It is time to let diet stop being that four letter word, and time to let myself work on a new lifestyle that will help develop the skills that I need to take off the weight.  I know it is not going to be easy, but I will call upon people that care about me to help support me.

I will talk about this in this blog, and become responsible for my own actions.  It will be a slow path, and it will be filled with stumbling stones and even places where the boulders seem to be in the way of my path.  But I will ask for a hand to help me push away the boulders, and I will dust myself off if I stumble on the stones.  I will never be that thin girl of my youth, I am not looking for her.  I want to be able to do things that I enjoy and feel healthy.  This is for me, I can’t do it for anyone else.

Category: Weight Loss My Story, What's It All About  Tags: , , ,  One Comment
31
Oct
Who Is Denyse?
Denyse

To my Twitter friends I am a dancing spirit that rushing through their stream daily.  People ask me what my avatar stand for, and I tell them it is the spirit within me.  The words in the background read live, work, play.

To crafters in the Art Rubber Stamp world I am a stamp designer, a rubber stamp artist, and a manufacture of rubber stamps and the co-owner, with my daughter, Laura, of  Lasting Impressions with Panache, an art rubber stamp company.

To my Internet friends I am co-owner of Dela Marketplace, a niche marketer with various websites, an article writer, co-owner of Nothing But Deals 4 U, co-owner of Dela Reviews and well as Dela’s Best Pics, often  found brainstorming with other Web Owners, and my twitter friends about the latest trends and marketing products.

To my family I am wife, mother, and friend.

But who is Denyse?  I was born in a small town in New Hampshire, the middle child.  I have two other siblings.  My family is very important to me. both my immediate family as well as my extended family.

This was taken in 1952

This was taken in 1952

I looked up to my older brother and helped in the care of my little sister. This picture was found last year when we were trying to put together a book for my father’s 90th birthday. As soon as I saw this picture it really brought me back to my childhood. I remembered getting that doll for Christmas. She was a walking doll and it was a very special gift, later at Easter the Easter bunny left me roller skates for her in my basket. I was wide-eyed and so happy. It was just what I had wanted!

As an adult, I have now realized that those early years have played a big part in the person that I am today. Ideals that you learn as a young child are cultivated and used as foundations to your whole belief system. My parents were very strong Christians and taught me
values and the need for integrity in my every day life.

Each day I learn more and more about myself. I have learned that I do not compromise my beliefs. I have learned the value of those that love you. My parents have always been the thread that held my extended family together. With both of my parents passing this year, my siblings and I have had the opportunity to renew many of the memories that we have cherished.

As I progress through this journal, I will be sharing more bits and pieces of who Denyse really is. She is more than that dancing spirit that you see in your twitter stream. If you are not following me on twitter, please do add me to your followers.  She is more than an Internet Marketer and more than a person who loves crafts and designing art rubber stamps.  Let us discover together, who I am and where I am going.

Category: What's It All About, Who Is Denyse  Tags: , , , , , , ,  7 Comments
27
Oct
Yes, What Is It All About?
Denyse

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.  ~e.e. cummings, 1955

This wonderful Quote by e.e. cummings was spoken when I was only nine years old.  I never read it then, and did not come across it for many years.  I am sure I never would have understood it then as I was far more concerned with the hula hoop, my new poodle skirt, my wonderful cat eye marbles, my Jill doll, and Girl Scouts.  That summer was my first year at sleep-away camp and it was a very exciting time in my life.  I would not have given a second thought to such a deep and meaningful quote.

I had important things to do that year, it was the first time I had a lay teacher and I did not care for her one single bit.  I could not wait to pass into the next grade and have the comfort of the nuns again.  And as I said, I was going to sleep-away camp.  That meant a new sleeping bag, a brand new mess kit, my very own flash light, and a real adventure away from home.  Maybe that summer was the very first time that I was able to be “nobody but yourself”.  I was away from my family, and the only person I knew at camp was my very best friend, Gloria.  I was away from the watchful eyes of my Parents and my Memere who also lived with us. I was out on my own.  I was left to see who I was and what I felt.  The transformation was a wonderment in itself.  You are challenged to be all that you can be, yet you are still allowed to be just who you are.  It was a magical time, and maybe it laid some of the cornerstones of my life.

This blog, is me exploring new things and sharing along the way things I discover.  I am learning each day new things about myself, who I am, where I am going and what it is like on the way.  I am also learning new things about Internet Marketing and Social Media and lots of other exciting areas.  I will be sharing both the good and the bad.  Things that work, and things that just did not pan out as I expected.  Promises made, that are not spoken truths and others that are more than I ever expected.

The beginning of this year I declared it a year of change.  I talked a lot about it on Twitter in Jan and Feb and I had intended to start this blog then.  Life got in the way, and I put it off.  I have discovered that there is no perfect time…that time is now, that time is tonight as I share my first posting with you.  The main thing I planned to change this year was my attitude.  It is a big undertaking, as I often listen to others and forget that it is more important to be who I am and to feel what I feel and to express it openly, in other words to be real.  In the past I have listened to negative people, and I found that you can easily start to hear those negative thoughts in your own mind.  So change in attitude.

Part of the change is developing a new business and knowing it will be a struggle, and having to start to let go of one that means a lot to me.

I did not know that there was to be a bigger change in my life this year with the passing of both of my parents within 13 months of each other.  This is a significant change in my life and a big one to adjust to.

So I hope that you will follow along with me as I journal about lots of things going on in my day to day life.  This might range from the fun things to the not so delightful events.  I will be talking about my twitter friends and all that they have given to me.  I will explore products that excite and ones that fall flat.  I really look forward now that I have gotten my feet wet, to explore Denyse, the real person she is, her weight struggles, her business adventures, the friendships she makes along the way and the things that she values that makes up the person she is.  Come take the road with me, I seem to follow my favorite poet Robert Frost and take the road less traveled.



Category: What's It All About  Tags: , , , , , , ,  Leave a Comment